How I Am Choosing to Live the Greatest Version of Me

A super Christmas gift from my colleagues at work listing the things they appreciate about me. The cool beans comment is a secret message to myself!

As much as I enjoyed celebrating with my family yesterday, I feel as if the new year is truly starting today. On this second morning of January, I finally get to fully implement all the goals I set up for myself over the holidays. As you may know by now, I love to set goals in all areas of my life. But this year, I made a big change. 

Since the beginning of December, I’ve been listening to the audio book The Wisdom of the Council by Sara Landon. In chapter three, goals and resolutions are described as not being really necessary since we simply need to live as if we already are the greatest version of ourselves. Setting goals would imply we were not, thus negating the whole thing. I had to listen to that part several times for my brain to get on board. Although the words felt right, my goal-loving self kept rejecting the concept. 

I finally found a way to bridge the two by making goals based not on achieving certain milestones but on getting rid of the things that bother me. I figured that if I clear the junk in my life, then it will be easier for me to focus on the greatest version of me.

At the top of the list is the state of my house. As much as I love order and cleanliness, writing is not compatible with either. The more assignments I land, the worst my house looks. And the worse my house looks, the harder it is to focus on the writing. I know that if I jump into a scrubbing, dusting, painting frenzy and try to do it all at once, I’ll get worn out and discouraged and give up before I’ve made much of a dent. So, I decided to spread out the work over a full year and see how it goes.   

To help with the process, I turned to my trusted bullet journal and made a chart dividing my house into nine rooms (there’s actually seven but I made it easier on myself by splitting the basements into three sections). While the plan is to finish one room every month, I’ve given myself a three-month leeway in case some rooms end up taking more time due to unforeseen circumstances. 

I chose to start with the basement for a couple of reasons. One, we had a miserable December. Although it’s been much milder than usual, with very little snow on the ground, it’s also been grey, damp, and not much fun to be outside. This means I won’t miss much by hiding myself away in the basement. Two, a lot of our tools and supplies are stored there. If I organize everything so that I can find things easily when I need them, I’ll save a lot of time when I’m ready to tackle the main rooms.  

I gave my house-cleaning plan a test drive over the holidays by focusing on the back room of the basement. So far, it’s working great. Not only did I get the work done in just a few days, but I discovered an unexpected positive side. As I now look at the other rooms in my house, instead of getting grumpy and depressed at all that still needs to be done, I find myself smiling and telling each problem area, “Don’t worry, I’ll get to you when your month comes.”

For my writing, I decided to do something similar. Topping the what’s-bothering-me list on that side of things is the information mess. Over the years, I accumulated lots of bits and pieces of info, and created tons of physical and digital files and folders. Finding what I need can sometimes be a challenge, especially when I’m in a hurry. So, I made a twelve-month chart in my writing bujo to help me sort the useful stuff and get rid of the rest. For January, I’d like to reorganize my idea files and folders. On the surface it looks like a huge job, but as I learned from cleaning that first basement room, I don’t have to wear myself out to make progress. I just need to remember to focus on that one topic this month and ignore all those other pieces that also need sorting. “Don’t worry,” I’ll tell them. “I’ll get to you when your month comes!”  

How to Deal With Hate Mail

I had my first hate mail a couple of weeks ago. It started well enough with “Dear Pascale, I just read your article about how you asked your grandmother for money.” To my surprise, it quickly went downhill from there. It was quite a long email, interspersed with words in all caps—perhaps to make sure I did not miss this woman’s displeasure? It would have been hard not to with such utterances as “truly shocked” and “shame on you.

The only shock on my part was that my writing had the power to provoke such animosity! Had I received this letter at the beginning of my writing career, I’m sure it would have had a much more destructive effect. But somehow the main feeling I was left with was bemusement. Having so little free time of my own, I simply could not imagine that someone could have put so much effort into penning this huge letter simply to tell me they hated my essay!

The letter ended with me not being worthy of my grandmother. At least, she was perfectly right on that score. My grandmother was a strong woman, both in body and in spirit, who lived under much harsher conditions than I ever will. She also possessed great common sense, and while always polite, was not easily intimidated. I doubt she would ever have been made to feel ashamed in any way. Taking a leaf from my grandmother’s book, I answered with the following: 

Thanks for your comments. Sorry you did not enjoy my essay. Hopefully my future work will connect with you better should you happen to read it.

All the best,

Pascale 

If this person’s goal was to stop me from writing, I’m afraid she did not succeed. I love creating essays. For me, it’s the best form of writing. I get to revisit bits and pieces of my past and connect them to the present in a meaningful way. If an editor happens to like my work enough to offer me payment for its publication, then I have received all the approval I will ever need. No amount of hate mail can change that. 

All I can add is, thank you Grand-maman for giving me this double opportunity to bring you back into my life and creating more memories of you in the process. 

And should you ever receive your own unprovoked and unasked-for hate mail, PLEASE don’t let others’ small mindedness keep you from doing the work YOU LOVE. There’s a big difference between receiving helpful comments or suggestions for improvements and a belittling, venomous sermon. If the message is not supportive, feel free to ignore it, go enjoy what’s left of your tulips, and KEEP ON WRITING!

The Weirdness and Beauty of Plans

I’ve noticed a strange phenomenon in my writing life. Every time I take action to land more assignments, things do happen, but somewhere completely different than where I intended. For example, I recently completed a course on feature writing for adult publications. I had barely started pitching magazines when an educational publisher approached me to write a nonfiction children’s book. That was not in the plan at all—at least not this one.  

I’m sure I must have mentioned this before, but I love making plans. They give me direction, a clear path to follow, and a feeling of safety and control. But I often wonder why I bother when the opportunities that show up never seem to be linked to my current plans. 

I suspect it’s largely due to the fact that the publishing industry tends to move very slowly. Getting any kind of response can take weeks if not months. But like most writers, I can’t afford to twiddle my thumbs until replies come in. I have bills to pay, stories I want to tell, new skills I wish to learn… and did I mention the bills? So I’m always in motion, constantly writing, learning, and reaching out to editors.

And because these two worlds don’t work in sync, I end up being offered a book contract from a children’s publisher I sent a letter of introduction to over two years ago instead of jumping into features for adult magazines.

Am I upset? Of course not. While I play it cool, I’m actually jumping and screaming for joy on the inside! Still, I sometimes wish my plans would work out the way they were supposed to. You wouldn’t believe how beautiful they look on paper. 

I think that the lesson here is this: If you want to write and get published, don’t be a control freak. Go ahead and make plans. They’re still important because they’ll get you to take action. Had I not followed through on my plan to contact educational publishers a couple of years ago, I wouldn’t be writing a book right now. But be willing to adjust the plan, put it on hold, or toss it out the window when great opportunities show up. 

And who knows, the editors I did manage to contact after my features writing course might answer me six months from now just as I finish another beautiful plan that’s completely unrelated to features. Again, I will be flummoxed by the strange timing, but you know what? I’ll be totally cool about it, and yes, totally jumping for joy on the inside, too! 

Now back to my book and my comfy socks…

Contract Woes

A couple of months ago, I received an offer to publish one of my Regency historical novels. 

I’d been trying to find a publisher for this manuscript for a while now, so receiving this offer was a big deal. But as eager as I was to get the process going, I chose to take my time to research book contracts. I hadn’t signed one in a long time and was due for a refresher course. 

Most book contracts are notorious for being nearly impossible to decipher. It’s almost as if every line is trying to trick you. Worse is when one clause contradicts another, making you feel as if the people writing these things either don’t know what they’re talking about or are extremely devious. 

To be clear, the publisher in question wasn’t a big gun. It was a small, newish operation with few titles on its list. But I was willing to give them a chance, seeing as they had a professional looking website, nice cover art, and made good use of social media to promote their authors and their work. 

One of the first clauses in the contract involved the rights being acquired. In this instance, they wanted everything. And by that, I mean every single right imaginable, including those yet to be invented. I’m aware that publishers will do this as a matter of course. It makes sense for them to try keeping as many rights as they think they can get away with. Some clueless or desperate writers might go along with this, but as I was neither, I crossed out all of it, except for digital and print rights.

My decision was not arbitrary. This publisher happens to sell mostly ebooks. They do have print books available, but as they’re print-on-demand, the price is much higher, making for a very difficult sell (meaning that only loving family members and very close friends would choose to buy a copy instead of putting the money towards their retirement funds or a six-month stay in Bali). Had this publisher held more clout, I’d have been open to discussing granting them additional rights, but unfortunately they weren’t at that stage yet. 

As I poured over the contract, I crossed off many other clauses as well as rewording several to make them more advantageous to me. I knew it was not likely that my changes would all be accepted. What I did expect however was an open discussion, leading to negotiations that would ultimately attempt to satisfy both parties. Instead, this is the reply I received:

“Unfortunately, a lot of your changes make it difficult for us to publish and advertise your book. Unfortunately, we’ll have to pass.”

Even though I was disappointed, I was glad of two things. One, that I had put in the time and effort to brush up on book contracts. The knowledge I gained was invaluable. And two, I learned that this publisher was not savvy enough to instigate negotiations. If they didn’t have a handle on such a basic skill, what else were they ignorant about? I feel that I have enough to learn at my end without having to worry they’re doing their job well. Otherwise, what’s the point? I may as well publish my own books. As I’m not quite ready to take that step yet, I’m off to do what I do best—write amazing stuff! 

Which reminds me, my latest article “When a Page a Day is Too Much” is featured in this week’s issue of Funds for Writers. Here’s the link:

https://fundsforwriters.com/when-a-page-a-day-is-too-much/

Recovering from Writer’s Brain Freeze

Brain freeze is something you associate with ice cream or a super cold drink. It’s certainly not the first thing that comes to mind when you think of writing, especially not at this time of year. I mean, brain freeze is all about panic, stress, pressure, and all sorts of fear-inducing factors, while summer is all about play, fun, and relaxation.

Summer is usually a happy time for me, not because I expect to put my feet up on a beach somewhere (although that would be nice, too), but because I get to have a whole month to write! My library job is temporarily suspended, my translation clients are off on their own adventures, leaving me totally free to write. This is the time when I start a new novel or attempt to finish a project in progress; when I let my mind wander and come up with amazing ideas; when I try new genres just for the fun of it. Pure and simple joy!

This summer things haven’t gone quite as expected. In fact, they took a completely downward turn. My happy expectations vanished overnight when unforeseen expenses drained my bank account to an alarming level. I needed to make money and fast!

Unfortunately stress and writing don’t mix well, at least not when you’re not used to it. In my case, during that first week of vacation, my brain literally froze. I learned that there’s a vast difference between self-imposed pressure and the real deal. It’s one thing to plan on increasing your income with your writing and set yourself goals and deadlines, but it’s quite another to be forced into it. Up until now, my writing had grown at its own slow pace, which is to be expected as I write part-time. But slow was suddenly, and definitely, not an option anymore.

I think what saved me from my brain freeze and got me moving again was, funnily enough, having to stack a bunch of firewood! Being relatively new to country living, my body is not used to hard labour. If I stack wood one day, I need the following one to recover. So I’d tire out my body one day and ease into writing the next. By the time all the wood was stacked at the end of the first week, I was able to keep right on writing.

So far, the positive thing that emerged from all this drama is that it is forcing me to come out of my safe and cozy, introverted shell. Although I’m an extremely friendly person, I don’t naturally reach out to people. But I realized that connecting with others and building relationships was crucial at this point. The need to make money hurled me way out of my comfort zone.

As I opened myself up and started reaching out to magazine editors, book publishers, former clients and employers, and anyone who might need my writing and translating skills, strange coincidences began to happen. A publisher I had not heard of in eight months turned down the picture book manuscript I had submitted, but encouraged me to send more stories directly to her. An ex bookstore colleague now turned educational book rep contacted me out of the blue to ask me if I knew writers, proofreaders, and translators who might be interested in working on a new line of activity books. Yes, me! Pick me! Then finally, finally, a magazine editor asked me to revise a short story for possible inclusion in her publication, and then accepted it after I did so!

None of these things have filled up my bank account yet, but they’re a great beginning. More importantly, they’ve given me hope and helped me renew my efforts with greater enthusiasm and energy.

The moral of the story is, if you ever find yourself with a case of writer’s brain freeze, do the following:

  1. Move your body in any way you can. It will help you stop worrying and clear your mind.
  2. Decide what needs to be done.
  3. Then do it! Don’t worry about the outcome. Just get on with it.
  4. Ask for help. Reach out to past and present clients, friends, social media groups, the universe. You never know who might be able to lend a hand.
  5. Don’t stop until you’re safely out of the danger zone. Take short breaks when you need to and do get a full night’s sleep, but don’t stop until you reach that safe point—only you know what that will be.

If all else fails, leave a comment below. Maybe I can help you work it out. But first, I need to reach my own safe point!

Do You Cut Corners and Settle for the Easy Win?

I’ve never been motivated by the easy win.

It used to drive my gym teacher crazy. Whatever team sport we’d play during phys ed, I hardly ever tried to score even though I was one of the best athletes in my school. I didn’t see the point of scoring against kids who could barely dribble the ball. I got a bigger kick out of helping them make that basket or sink the ball between the goal posts.

The same thing happened in class. I would never answer easy questions unless I absolutely had to. I’d only raise my hand when a juicy problem would come up, when there was a chance I might be wrong. Again, teachers seemed baffled by this attitude.

In both cases, it always amazed me that my teachers could not see what I was doing. When actual game time came along or exams popped up, I never fooled around with scoring and getting all those right answers in. Because then, it mattered.

Maybe that’s part of the reason why I’m attracted to writing. There’s nothing easy about it. And there’s no guarantee of success either.

Starting a book doesn’t mean you’ll finish it. I should know. I have several unfinished manuscripts to prove the point.

Finishing a book doesn’t guarantee it will find a publisher. Again, I have many orphans in my files.

Publishing a book doesn’t automatically ensure it will get read, bring fame, or even stay in print for long. One of my books survived for less than one month before the publisher unexpectedly decided to close up shop.

No, there’s nothing easy about writing. But there’s nothing that could bring me more joy, pride, and satisfaction either.

If you like easy wins then maybe writing is not for you. But then again, it doesn’t need to remain a struggle. If you’re not making the progress you desire, then it’s a sure sign you need to change your game plan.

Start by answering these questions honestly:

  • Are you putting enough time into your writing?
  • Are you keeping up with market news?
  • Are you querying, pitching, and submitting regularly?
  • Are you learning continuously?

Just because you’re a part-time writer doesn’t give you a free pass to skip the steps necessary to succeed. Sure, you may not have as much time as some other writers do, but it’s not a valid excuse to cut corners.

A friend of mine publishes at least one novel a year. He teaches full-time, has three kids, and is involved in various causes and activities. He certainly hasn’t skipped any steps to reach this level of success. I bet he’s not motivated by the easy win either.

What about you? Will you settle for the easy win—or take a chance, invest in your dream and become the writer and person you want to be? The choice is all yours.

Claim Your Writing Career

How do you introduce yourself when you have more than one career? That question still stumps me sometimes. When people ask me what I do for a living, do I say that I am a writer, a translator, or a librarian? The answer is… It depends!

If I want to promote a specific aptitude, then I’ll stick to one particular job. For example, when I happen to strike up a conversation with an editor at a book fair, you may be sure I will put the emphasis on my writing career.

However, if I introduce myself to a new neighbour, I will most likely mention all three. Why? Because any one of my careers may bring me in contact with more assignments either directly or indirectly should that person know someone who has a need for one of my professional skills.

If you’re a beginner, you may be tempted to say, “Oh, I just write part-time.” Please, eliminate the word just from your vocabulary when speaking of your work. By inserting that tiny little word, you are demeaning your writing considerably, as if you are worth less than someone who writes full-time. As we all know, more is not necessarily better. Don’t be timid about it – claim your writing career from the get-go.

On the other hand, if you’ve been writing part-time for several years, you may feel embarrassed that you haven’t reached full-time status yet. I personally went through this phase when I reached my ten-year milestone. I kept reading success stories of these new kids on the block who had made it after selling their very first book, and here I was still writing whenever I could fit it in. If this is the case for you, feel free to drop the part-time part altogether, especially if it’s not relevant to the situation at hand.

Am I less dedicated than someone who writes full-time? Absolutely not! I am simply more focused. Because each and every minute counts, I never take my writing for granted, and I bet this is the case for you as well.

I’ve come to realize that the expression part-time actually means precious because my time is exactly that. So whatever activity I choose to do, it has to be a worthy one. Therefore, whoever I happen to write, translate, or librariate for should definitely feel special.

So, be proud of your part-time status and the next time anyone asks you what you do, claim your chosen careers with confidence!